There are two kinds of sugar babies out there who love living life in the sugar bowl. The first is potentially open to the idea of commitment should the right sugar daddy happen to come along. But the second type loves the freedom a more casual approach to sugaring gives her. She loves keeping her options open and perhaps even prefers maintaining more than one relationship at a time.
If you’re the first type of sugar baby, then realizing a sugar daddy is head over heels in love with you is probably a dream come true. But what if you’re the second type? What if you like your sweet sugar life the way it is and don’t feel ready to commit just one sugar daddy? Here are some suggestions for handling the situation with grace.
Sit him down for some real talk.
If you’ve been sugaring for long, then the chances are pretty good that you’ve completely mastered the fine art of being a terrific sugar baby. You know how to be charming, flirtatious, loving, engaging, and supportive in precisely the right ways. Meanwhile, words like drama, jealousy, and pettiness simply aren’t in your vocabulary. (How could a sugar daddy possibly help but fall in love with you?)
Naturally, keeping things real and honest is another key trait of a world-class sugar baby, so let your instincts be your guide here. You’ve no doubt been honest with your daddy about what you are and aren’t looking for, and like most sugar daddies, he’s undoubtedly a sensible man with a good head on his shoulders. So a gentle reality check is likely all he needs to set him straight.
Most sugar relationships come attached to a specific arrangement that was made very clear to both parties right in the beginning. So now is the time to compassionately remind your daddy of that agreement. The chances are pretty good that that reality check is all your daddy needs to snap out of the trance he’s in and get your relationship back on track.
Consider whether it’s time to move on.
Now let’s say, for the sake of argument, that your sugar daddy doesn’t snap out of his current mindset. He’s decided he’s in love with you, that he wants to take your relationship to another level, and nothing less will do. He knows what he wants, and he’s decided that what he wants is a committed relationship with you.
If that’s not something you’re willing to consider, it might be time to consider walking away from the relationship. After all, sugar relationships only work when both people are on the same page and after the same things. Also, sugar relationships are noteworthy for their strong focus on honesty and a marked lack of the drama you might expect in traditional relationships, so you should be able to part ways amicably.
However, it’s still important to let your sugar daddy down easily to the greatest extent possible. Unrequited love isn’t a walk in the park for anyone, even emotionally mature, successful people like your sugar daddy. Gently tell him that you care about him very much, but you simply don’t return his feelings. Then explain that you’re not ready for the type of commitment he’s looking for. Even if it hurts to hear, he’ll likely appreciate your honesty. If you’re still interested in seeing him, you can let him know this, but make it clear that the terms you’ve already agreed on together need to stay intact. Then see what he says and take it from there.
Consider whether you might feel the same way.
It’s also worth considering whether you might actually return your sugar daddy’s feelings. Although it’s certainly possible that you’re still strictly interested in a no-strings-attached arrangement, are you sure that’s the case? Yes, part of the initial appeal of a sugar relationship is the lack of the same messiness you’d expect from a more traditional situation, but the right person might be worth it. After all, people change, and so do feelings.
That said, it’s not unheard of for a sugar couple to start on casual terms and have their feelings evolve into something else over time. If you think this may be the case for you, sit down with your sugar daddy and discuss it. Perhaps together, you can come up with a new set of ground rules that allows you to explore your new feelings for one another without disturbing the bliss of your current arrangement.
Of course, every sugar dater does what they can to ensure their arrangements stay as clean and hassle-free as possible. But people are also only human, so it’s important to know what to do if someone catches deeper feelings at some point along the way. Successful sugar babies know themselves well and aren’t afraid to stick to their guns when they know what they want.