There are lots of benefits to doing your sugaring online instead of sticking solely to the opportunities that are available to you in your locale. Online sugaring opens your world up and puts lots of options on the table that simply wouldn’t be there otherwise. It also gives you a simple, easy way to get to know lots of potential sugar daddies when you have time, which is great for busy sugar babies.

But an aspiring sugar baby who’s serious about getting the most out of her time in the sugar bowl should be doing more than passively sitting back and waiting for potential daddies to message her. Your chances of meeting someone truly special skyrocket if you’re willing to be the first to reach out when you see someone you like.

But knowing you really should be making the first move when you spot someone special on your favorite sugaring sites is one thing. Actually, finding the guts to do it is another. Here are a few tips for taking the stress and guesswork out of things.

Remember that you’re both in the same boat.

Messaging someone out of the blue on a dating site because you found something about them attractive hits a lot differently than it would on a random social media site like Facebook or Twitter. Unlike Facebook and Twitter, everyone on a sugar dating platform is there for the same reasons you are – to meet someone special who’s interested in entering into a mutually beneficial sugar arrangement.

In other words, you and the daddy who just caught your eye are there are the same reasons, meaning he’s perfectly fine with hearing from you. Besides, you might well be the sugar baby of his dreams, but you’ll never know unless you message him.

Tell him what interests you about him.

If getting over your nerves and deciding to be the one to break the ice is the hardest part of sending a first sugar message, then figuring out what to say has to be the second hardest, right? Remember, honesty is the foundation of any great sugar connection, and it’s the primary reason most people make the jump to sugar dating in the first place.

So, forget the cheesy openers and simply tell this intriguing new person what actually interested you about their profile. Was it a sparkling sense of humor that made you laugh out loud? Maybe they have a niche interest in something you’re super passionate about. Go ahead and be upfront about it. Everyone appreciates a genuine compliment freely given, daddies included.

Make it obvious you’ve read his profile.

Although men on vanilla dating platforms don’t get nearly as many messages as women do, things can sometimes be different on sugaring platforms. This is especially the case for potential sugar daddies who are particularly handsome, affluent, or noteworthy in some way. That said, it’s a good idea to err on the side of caution, assume your target daddy gets lots of messages, and differentiate yourself in a good way.

Many would-be sugar babies who are into messaging first are trying to cover as much ground as quickly as possible to maximize their chances of meeting someone, and it’s usually pretty obvious. So, set yourself apart by sending a really thoughtful message that shows you’ve truly read the person’s profile. They’ll appreciate that you took the time, and your genuine interest will definitely show.

End your message with an open question.

Once you’ve opened with your reasons for contacting your target, as well as a few thoughts on specific details from his profile, follow up with an interesting fact or two about yourself. Naturally, those facts should intersect with something specific about the person you’re messaging, so he can see you have something in common.

For example, if he mentions being a huge history buff and you majored in history, bring that up. Or if several things in his profile scream that he loves dogs and you do, too, by all means mention it and share a detail or two about your current furry friend. No need to brag or try to impress him with your knowledge. Just say a nice word or two about the mutual connection.

Finally, close with an open-ended question – a question that requires more than a simple yes or no answer. Not only does such a question encourage someone to write back, but it gives someone who’s potentially shy or not great at messaging an easy in. Your question can be anything, really, so long as it encourages further conversation.

At the end of the day, sending the first message on a sugaring site sounds more intimidating than it really is, especially when you know how to go about it. So, what are you waiting for? Message that daddy and brighten his day. You might both end up glad you did.